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Pastafarianism
Eye Maties..........All Hail the Pastafarians & the Great , all knowing, Flying Spaghetti Monster !!!!!!!!!!
Open Letter http://www.venganza.org/ Arrrgg! Funny indeed, this man with the pasta. I be born again........ and I have always missed the pirates, and I knew deep inside, I had faith, that there would be some explanation, somehow the proof of how much we need them. Noodly Appendage, avenge them, I pray. |
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hahahahahaha
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I want the FSM Pirate fish... arr!
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Ask Questions the Smart Way ![]() "In front of a monitor is a dangerous place from which to view the world." --Terri Wells Enable BSOD: Control Panel/Systems, Advanced Tab, hit the Settings button under Startup and Recovery, and under the System Failure area, uncheck the Automatically Restart checkbox. |
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ha, that's just like NDL For President at FONDL.... I have one of the t-shirts
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A me buck-os,
Woe is he who will not pilot ye life by his course. Curse all for doughten the all mighty!! His noodlinesss is most happy that ye be for him. Me hope is that his great noodley appendage will find succor in all our orifi. FSM has over 25 million hits by today, running at 2 million/day since the 25th. and it was in the Sunday Washington Post yesterday!! His noodley appendage will soon touch us all. Here's a fallow up for your religiously inclined friends: The Onion | Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling http://www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4133&n=2 Erich the Red (oops wrong century) |
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Oh man, I want to tell all my pagan friends about this one! lol!
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"A desk is a dangerous place from which to watch the world." -- John le Carre |
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Pagans are stuck in the past. you should kick them, and force them to hand over any artwork they may be holding.
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theres nothing technical in religion. you are or you aren't.
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Quote:
Well, a pagan is someone who belives in multiple gods, IIRC. An Agnostic tries to take the middle ground- maybe there's a god, maybe not. An Athiest belives there is no god, period. If you want an example in terms of cows: TALIBAN You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which is two. You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private parts. At night when no one is looking, you milk both of them. Then you kill them and claim a US bomb blew them up while they were in the hospital. METHODISM You have two cows. They start a farm holy club, then preach throughout the countryside until all the animals experience revival, then they all camp out together and sing a lot. BUDDISM You have two cows. You do not desire their milk so you are not unhappy when it is unavailable. Your lack of desire and dependency on external sources of happiness is about to let you escape the cycle of life and suffering (so that you don't get reincarnated into a cow), but then the Chinese come and destroy or take away everything that's yours. UNITARIAN-UNIVERSALISM You have two cows; They smoke in their religious services, and refuse to be nailed down in any belief, except that all cows will enjoy the benefits of becoming 'Filet Mignons' rather than dog food. EPISCOPALIANISM You have Anglophile two cows. They are American, but speak with English accents, sit around and smoke the best cigars, drink the finest wine, and enjoy each other's delicious intellectualism. On occasion they give sermons to the other cows on how to be a better steward of their money. AMISH You have two cows. You milk them manually, transport the milk by foot or bicycle, and trade it for wood, water, and other useful things. MORMON You have two cows. You feed them only natural foods. One is away on a two-year mission right now. You give your church one tenth of the milk your remaining cow produces. JEHOVA'S WITNESSES You have two cows. You go door to door to see if anyone else's cows want to join yours. SHINTO You have two cows. One rings a huge bell as the other continuously chants, "Amida Holstein". ATHEISM You have two cows. The evidence is all around the farmyard, s**t everywhere, but you still don't believe they exist. CHRISTIAN You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbour. AGNOSTIC You may or may not have two cows, it's really logically impossible to determine. - OR (and I think I like this better) - You have two cows. Just by looking a them, it is impossible to determine how they came into being. JUDAISM You have two cows. Their ancestors escaped slavery and went on to be mistreated and prosecuted throughout history. You give them a pasture, but then other animals fight over it. PROTESTANTISM You have 2 cows, they read the bible all day, one disagrees with the other over a petty issue, one cow leaves and forms a new church. CATHOLICISM You have two cows. You feel guilty for having cows and go to confession; your parish priest tells you that having cows is not in itself a sin in the eyes of God, but if you are feeling guilty about it, perhaps you should free the cows and say ten Hail Mary’s. TAOISM You have two cows. A black one, and a white one. You name them yin and yang. You don't touch them for fear of making them unbalanced. You decide to meditate on the subject. NEO-PAGANISM You have two cows. You perform charms and complicated rituals to ensure their safety and health. During the full moon and on holidays you dance around them naked and decorate them with berries. While trying to heal their auras you decide they should not be caged and let them roam free. One cow strays into the road and gets hit by a truck, you only have one cow, until your next ritual calls for a sacrifice, you now have no cows. BAPTIST You have two cows. They refuse to associate with any other of the livestock, and read only the oldest version of bovine truth. ISLAM You have two cows. One refuses to join your jihad, so you kill it. The other wears a full-length burka so as not to excite any of the bulls. CHRISTIAN SCIENCE You have two cows. One dies, but you deny that reality. The other reads 'Science and Health' and 'Key to the Scriptures' all day long. HINDUISM You have two well-fed cows. God forbid you touch them. |
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